Part 17 of my spiritual journey series. It was December 2015 and I was pregnant with my third child. Despite having two previous successful homebirths under my belt, I was having a lot of uncharacteristic fears about the birth of my next child. We were planning another homebirth, but suddenly I was terrified of something going terribly … Continue reading 17: Foreshadow of Rebirth on the Winter Solstice
anatomy of a panic attack
Yesterday I experienced my first real anxiety/panic attack in about 4 months. It blew in like a crazy storm and then faded out just as quickly, and then the anxiety mildly rained on and off the rest of the day like a summer afternoon. I felt a need to write out exactly what was going … Continue reading anatomy of a panic attack
16: Meeting Myself with Phosphorus
Part 16 of my spiritual journey series. In October of 2015, I decided to take the homeopathic remedy Phosphorus 1M. I had no idea what I was doing. I knew this remedy had something to do with openness/boundaries, and I was trying to be more open to myself and spiritual direction. I'd only taken the remedy … Continue reading 16: Meeting Myself with Phosphorus
if all the spinning plates fall…
Hi. I'm Grace. I have too many plans and grand ideas and I'm not sure how to do it all. Two years ago I was having a serious breakdown. I wasn't doing anything. I wasn't ambitious and had zero plans. I was just trying to survive my existential crisis, just trying to find a point … Continue reading if all the spinning plates fall…
Yet another brush with Mercury
Whenever I'm in some emotional funk, my method of processing (or coping with...) the Crazy is to write a long string of absurdities on my blog or to my doctor. I decided to leave my poor doctor out of this round, so I'll emotionally vomit all over you lovely people who are so unfortunate to … Continue reading Yet another brush with Mercury
Heartbreaking Beauty
I’ve been dealing with some heavy stuff lately, confronting Death and Life and my place in the middle of it all. I was feeling anxious last night and this poem came out of me.
I do not need resolution for mental conflict
There is conflict, I feel it raging within. It is an empathy for others, and for myself. It is all out war and it can be exhausting. And then, a grand revelation: I don't have to pick sides. Chaos will tell me that if I just pick an opinion, pick a side, make up my … Continue reading I do not need resolution for mental conflict
The Joy of Transformation
If I’m not happy with a current work in progress or even a finished piece, I change it. I take it apart, a little or a lot, and transform it into something new. Possibilities are endless. Why settle for what does not inspire joy? I’m all about joy. If it doesn’t spark joy, it’s time to change (Yes, I became a KonMari convert in 2018).
One of my favorite transformations. Story about this piece coming soon.
My latest transformation piece is a butterfly, which seems appropriate. Butterflies are symbols of transformation, starting as chunky weight-bound caterpillars and eventually turning into light graceful flying butterflies.
My original plan for this piece did not happen, as I cut too little cord (frequent problem of mine). I tried turning it into something else, and still did not like the results.
Tried to make the best of it, but didn’t like how it turned…
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15: Meeting the Serpent
Continuing my spiritual journey series: The night of October 11th, 2015, I had one of the most profound dreams of my life thusfar: I am standing naked with a snake wrapped around me. Starting with it's tail at my head, the snake is wrapped around my head, shoulders, and chest, with its head ending at my … Continue reading 15: Meeting the Serpent
14: Embracing Sensitivity
When I was a teenager, I attributed my excessive and ever changing emotions on being a teenage girl, and believed that I'd eventually grow out of it. Oh, how I longed for the day when I would be an emotionally stable adult! Of course I laugh now and want to tell teenage me, "Bless your … Continue reading 14: Embracing Sensitivity
