I have tried to fit into the countless boxes of others' experiences. I have divided myself into countless pieces that would fit into those countless boxes. All of me will not fit into someone else's box. So I cut off the small part that will… …over and over again, with each small box of someone … Continue reading The Whole Self
healing
15: Meeting the Serpent
Continuing my spiritual journey series: The night of October 11th, 2015, I had one of the most profound dreams of my life thusfar: I am standing naked with a snake wrapped around me. Starting with it's tail at my head, the snake is wrapped around my head, shoulders, and chest, with its head ending at my … Continue reading 15: Meeting the Serpent
13: Into the Shadow (feat. Taylor Swift)
Continuing my spiritual journey series... As I began trying to be nice and listen to myself for a change, I came across a short story I wrote for my English class when I was 18. I hadn't read it in a few years, and as I read it again I was quite shocked at how much … Continue reading 13: Into the Shadow (feat. Taylor Swift)
12: Wrestling with Myself, Part 2
Continuing yesterday's post, Day 11: Wrestling with Myself, Part 1 I emailed a few of my blogs posts to my doctor and he started reading some other posts on my blog. When we met, he brought up a post I wrote about demons. In this post, I detailed a dream I'd had years before during my health … Continue reading 12: Wrestling with Myself, Part 2
11: Wrestling with Myself, Part 1
About a week after I found out I was pregnant, I started going downhill. Yes, the nausea kicked in, which is always no fun, but something else was going on. I was suddenly depressed, seemingly out of the blue. Things in my life that I thought I'd made peace with suddenly sprang up in my … Continue reading 11: Wrestling with Myself, Part 1
10: Communion, Part 2
Continuing yesterday's post, Day 9: Communion, Part 1. After my bizarre shaking episode at the wedding, it happened two more times in the following two weeks. Each time was less severe and I made sure to lay down as soon as I felt it coming over me. I was worried I had some sort of … Continue reading 10: Communion, Part 2
9: Communion, Part 1
2014 was a rough year for me. Although the birth of our second child was healing in so many ways, becoming a mother again was dreadfully difficult for me at that time. Our new daughter had an insane appetite for life and required so much attention and supervision. She also nursed constantly and I was … Continue reading 9: Communion, Part 1
8: Wrestling with God After the Death of My Child
Six years ago today my first child died at only 18 months old. She was diagnosed with cancer and a month later she was gone. Her sickness, death, and the events which transpired immediately afterwards were incredibly traumatic for my husband and I. Our families were devastated. Our hearts were broken. And we were all … Continue reading 8: Wrestling with God After the Death of My Child
Channeling anxious energy into productive energy
I've been dealing with anxiety on and off this past week. When the undercurrent is there, it doesn't take much to set me off and turn me into spastic basket case. I had a bad attack last night and this morning I could feel it coming on again. In more recent times, I've decided against … Continue reading Channeling anxious energy into productive energy
Pain is the place where everything is fragmented. Oh, how I wish to be the glue! I'm not sure how to fix myself, I'll just try to fix you.
